never die.

On the edge, falling in.
over and over again.
Repeatedly asking; when this will all end?
When will they stop leaving?
Constantly holding back the hurt.
Wishing I could see them again.
They come when my eyes are shut,
but then you have to wake up.
The reality is the nightmare,
because they're not here.
Scattered pictures on the floor,
of better days from way before.

A toast.

The band played in a dark lit bar,

the guitarist strummed a somber melody.

Double shot of whiskey on the rocks for me

said she, who sat at the bar, looking kind of lonely.

A stranger next to her couldn't help but ask,

"are you sad little girl?"

She half smiled and her eye's glistened.

There is no little girl left inside of me,

and by are you sad, meaning; am I not happy?

that's a loaded question old man...

This whole world is filled with hopelessness but also with hope,

it's filled with deceit, but also with honesty,

it's overwhelmed by death, but also with birth,

it's touched with broken hearts, but loaded with love.

It's a black and white world we live in,

but because I can point out the sadness and feel it, does not mean I am not happy.

Because I can sit here and think about the forsaken, or write about deeper feelings,

or throw my hands in the air in the verge of anger.

Or because I have loved and lost, made mistakes and learned, fallen and gotten back up, does not mean I am not happy.

It means one thing;

I'm living.

The old man smiled at her with dark eyes,

lifted his glass, "a toast to living".

Dear Tyler

Dear Tyler,

Tears fill our eyes,
faces burn, there are sleepless nights.
It's an emptiness, and everything seems a mess.
Where did you go?
I miss you so.
I'm so sorry, things were hard.
Wishing I could turn it around,
make your life full of high's.
Wishing I could have said good-bye.
I miss your phone calls at 3 a.m. and
Cruises in the Jetta,
listening to the used and taking back Sunday.
Oh, what I would give, to go back to that day.
I'd wipe your tears, and tell you its ok.
Hold you tightly and not let go...

Spread your wings baby and shine down on us.
I know your at peace, and finally happy.
One day we'll all see you again,
Until then.. We’ll keep singing;

"These are my people
This is where I come from
Were givin' this life everything we got and then some
It ain't always pretty
but it's real
It's the way we were made
Wouldn't have it any other way"

Love you always and forever,
always in my mind, always in my heart.

See you at the Crossroads.
Rip. Love Marie

i'm just a girl.

Take me off this pedestal,

take me out of the light,

i'm just a girl.

and I don't do everything right.

I make mistakes and I fall down.

I have scars, cuts and bruises in and out.

The cover of a pretty book,

the title is the most that's read.

Alcohol lingers, conversation is hasty.

Bodies kept close, yet so far apart.

Coming back for more,

when you should depart.

Lips tremble,

got me shaken up,

stumbling around,

my hearts beating.

That's all it will be.

How many times will you let people let you down.

When is something guaranteed.

People touch you every day.

It's only in a rare occasion, that someone makes your heart beat.

Makes your blood rush and time stand still.

They lift you off your feet,

with out saying anything at all.

When you have everything, you have everything to lose.

Do things happen for a reason?

Do we really believe things happen for a reason?

Or is this a deceptive support system, to make us feel absolute?

Is this a response we hear from others or ourselves, to ease the fear of the unknown?

In the case of a letting a goal slip away, maybe it was meant to be,

maybe we just didn't work hard enough.

In the loss of a loved one, maybe they weren't meant to go.

Maybe accidents happen, maybe there are cures to illness' that are hidden from us.

Maybe it's easier to let a relationship slip away, and give a simple fictive reasoning that there is a better door awaiting, rather then working on it.

Are we taking the easy way out?

Are we not conquering our fears, because we are scared?

Or could it be true? That there is a plan for us, that is unknown to us, and one day, it will all make sense.

Maybe one day we'll look back and think, i'm glad I never attained that goal, because if I did I wouldn't be where I am today.

Maybe there is some metaphysical after world, where the one's we love and lost, are there watching, protecting, and doing greater good than they could have executed, in the phenomenal world.

Maybe that relationship was a stepping stone to a soul mate.

Maybe we are scared, but it's fear that makes us curious and question.

And it's only questions and curiosity, that will help us find the answers.

Why is it that in the pursuit of feeling lonely, and perhaps sad,

we feel like we're all alone?

Like we're the only one's in this rut.

We entertain ourselves with any liveliness that will strike emotion.

And it's all for love.

For the one we thought we loved, for the one we loved who we let get away, for the one who broke our heart, for the one who's heart we broke.

For the one we thought we could love, who would never live up to it.

For the fear of love.

Why do we tape our lips?

Why are words never enough,

and nothing ever seems to come out right.

Why is that buried deep below all the questions, we know that one day we'll know,

and that everything will be alright.

Tonight in the search of some sort of sparked emotion,

I came across a message, typed for someone specific.

Someone who will probably never read it.

It was a place I never read from;

but tonight I did.

Titled "miss you.. "

"It's been so long since I've held you. I miss you so much. I hope you're still my friend.

I love you still, and always think about you. Your eyes, your smile and you laying in my arms.
Wish u were here . I miss my bestfriend. " (Anonymous)

Why couldn't it be said to her? Why are we so afraid?

But in the end at least we're not alone.