No Regrets. Just Love.

Smile, Big.
Laugh, Hard.
Dance, Ridiculously.
Sing, Proud.
Befriend, Everyone.
Stop, Worrying.
Love, Yourself.
Trust, Your Instincts.
Stay forever young.
Live the dream.

Your Never Going To Keep Me Down

Empty,
but i feel so heavy.
i'm like everyone else,
just trying to get by.
and for some reason you won't let me.
I no longer cry, it doesn't hurt, burn, or flare.
it's numbing.
Your taking away my ability to care.
I am going to keep getting up.
no matter how many times you push me down.
I'm gunna be fine.
After every mess you make, and everything of mine you break,
it's o.k.
because one day. the stars will align, and your world will turn grey.
You made me stronger, and pushed me away.
You caused disarray in my life.
I hope it eats at you, everyday.

Before it Breaks- Brandi Carlile

Around here it’s the hardest time of year
Waking up, the days are even gone
Though the color of my coat
Lord help me killing off the cold
Where the raindrops sting my eyes
I keep them closed
I don’t feel a lot of pain only the lonely
And my quietest friend
Ever the moonlight, have I let you in
Say it ain’t so, say I’m happy again

Say it’s over, say I’m dreamin
Say I’m better than you left me
Say you’re sorry, I can take it
Say you’ll wait, say you won’t
Say you love me, say you don’t
I can make my own mistakes
Let it bend before it breaks

I’m all right, don’t I always seem to be?
Am I swinging on the stars
Don’t I wear them on my sleeves
But when you’re looking for a crossroads
It happens every day, and whichever way you turn
I‘m gonna turn the other way

Say it’s over, say I’m dreamin
Say I’m better than you left me
Say you’re sorry, I can take it
Say you’ll wait, say you won’t
Say you love me, say you don’t
I can make my own mistakes
And learn to let it bend before it breaks

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This song is, incredible, and truly hits home lately.

Changes... so many changes, every corner I look, things are changing.

The season is ending, the summer sun is drifting away.

People are changing, always coming in and out of people's lives.

I am changing.

Falling apart seems so easy.

Seeing pictures of him and her,

not hearing his words, it will be ok.

He used to say.

The worst is, I know it will be ok.

Losing someone is the worst, but life goes on.

The world keeps spinning.

my thoughts get so lost lately, feel like my brain is in some sort of captivity.

Bring it back to me.

I've always just wanted to be free.

Mistakes make you stronger, lead you to that path you need to be on.

Stuck at a crossroad, but there are a million different roads,

how is someone supposed to know?

So you choose one that feels right, because at that moment in time it's what you wanted.

But the the lights always go down, the sun sets, and it gets cold.

and even surrounded by people, you feel so alone, so misunderstood.

The sun always rises, and a smile always finds a way to come through,

and it's the good in the world, the good in people, that gives you a different view.

fictive affinity

Help me I can't breathe,
suffocating.
I'm your refugee
My blood is seething
I already gave you my plea.
And I think we're both guilty,
But the judges are us,
and we weren't making any progress.

A fictive affinity
you and me.
It hurts to stay,
and gone, I'm a scathe
Repenting everyday,
But this is the only way.

This Song.

There's this song,
that brings peace to my life.
A sense of relief, but a piece of sadness.
How can this piece of sadness make me feel so strong?
Out of all the world's strife,
I play his voice,
and I can breathe.
Play on repeat.
I listen to every beat,
every breath
every word.
It's all heard.

Forever-Ben Harper.

Too Naive to See

What if everything could be ok?
If it could be normal.
If all of this could go away.

If these tears would disappear.
If the words you spoke were real.
This is not how I would feel.

I need the highs,
so sick of these lows.
Missing all the smiles.

I wan't to be alright.
can't stand this fight.

But these lies lie within,
they won't go away.
and I won't stay.

Why should I care?
When you didn't care.
I was always there, open hearted.
I was so unprepared.
So naive.

Left all alone to grieve.

Breath Deep, Let Go.

Breath Deep, let go.
My chest shakes
my lips tremble.
my insides ache,
i'm feeling pretty low.

It's all flash backing in my mind.
I shake my head for it to go away.
I wish I could unwind.
Everything is astray.

How long must this go on?
I have withdrawn.
My sword is down, my hands are free.
Why does it still hurt me.